Go full wad.

It's funny when you realize that you have no idea what you look like to other people. Depending on what room my mirror is in, how I stand, what I'm wearing, and where the light is in relation to the mirror, I look alternately like a pretty hot, short girl with a thick rump OR like a pretty thick, short girl that looks like she's hot.

I imagine that for other people it's more one way than the other. And maybe it even changes depending on the person and how much they like girls, short girls, rumps, thick rumps, short thick girls, etc. But whoever the person is, I'm sure that I'm cartoonish. I just can't figure out if I'm cartoonish in a "Look at that bubble person gettin' her bubbles everywhere" kind of way or in a "I want that big butted girl to...hell...I don't care what she does. Look at that big butt." kind of a way.

Whatever the answer, it's probably best to assume that it's the coolest or sexiest option and run with it. No one ever found half-way appealing.